7 replies to this topic

[Lancelot]

Hurt my arm this morning and had to go to hospital for an x-ray, as I was sitting waiting to be seen, the lad next to me said

 

" Fair fae yer honest sonsieface! Great chieftain o' the puddin race!!"

 

I was thinking eh?!?!.

 

I turned my head round to the the lady sat on my other side,

she said, "Wee, sleekit, cow'rin, tim'rous beastie, O, what a panic's in thy breastie!".

 

I said to the next doctor walking past , "Here mate, is this the psychiatric ward?"

He said .......

 

"No sorry this is the Burns unit"

 

[discv]

Well it's better than the tourette 'joke' that was picked as a winner at Edinburgh!

[Ozzie]

Wassa ee zayin ? Whirrs ee to ?

ee gotta be vrom Scotland . ooh ar

down yer in Zomerset we speaks proper like

[granpa]

We have proper Queens English here, queens from every continent

[Lancelot]

Queens?  Do you mean fairies?

[Avon]

Driving by Regents Park the sat nav kept saying 'Bear left', 'Bear left'.

 

I then realised I was passing London Zoo.

[granpa]

On the subject of Hospitals and the like, I have heard that diarrhea is an inherited complaint, something about it running in ones genes

[Lancelot]

Not one of my normal messages . Bit more serious . If anybody knows of any lonely old people who will be eating Christmas dinner alone because they have no family or close friends, can they let me know, I need to borrow some chairs.